ഹൃദയത്തിന്‍റെ ഡയറിക്കുറിപ്പ്‌ [മന്ദന്‍ രാജാ] 441

N¼nNp«³.sWäv bns¶ A^ `nä^v bm`pw ^*p bpjp§n] fp«]pw .bns¶ sSmjp¯ns` b\n¡v b\n¡ms^ him]n¡pN , bns¶ ASv Njnªm`v b_¼ns` b\nNapw fäpw sI¿pN … bSnsWm¶p f\n¡v {bmS`v . A¸tfm bpt«m A§sWs]s´¦n`pw bns¶ ASnsâ NqsX Ss¶ A`vbw tIm_pw .. C_¨n]pw foWpw Wn^vdÔw .bns¶ H^p_¡w B\v … fq¶p f\n¡v Fjpt¶äv ko*pw b_¼nt`¡v . A©^t]msX Wn^v¯n , Npjt¼ms¡ tSs¨m^p Npan . B_p f\n¡v Nk`]nt`¡v.. AknXpÅ ss`{d _n]n`v tbm]n b{S bm^m]\w..tlgw UmtfmV^sâ Im] ¡X]n`v Wns¶m^p Im] , A`vbw Wm«p k^v¯fmWw .. bns¶ Gj^t]msX ko«nt`¡v … Np_¨p b¨¡_n h`mZpw H^p¡n , NqsXs]m^p fq¶^ sb¤pw ^*p I¸m¯n]pw fpa¸n¨ b]t_m , Asæn`v b^nt¸m . HWvbS^¡v D_¡w …k^vg§am]n SpX^v¶v sNm*v tbmNp¶ NrSyWnãNav fq`w fmSyp hm_nWp b_]¯¡ Bt^mPy {blvW§tam t^mP§tam Cà …
bp_Nns` fp_n]n`v Wn¶v kym]mfkpw Njnªp Nn¨\n`v k¶p bm`pw fp«]pw Njn¨n«]mav sSmjp¯nt`¡v WX¶p .
‘ tlO^Wv Np_ªntà KmWNn ?”” fmSyp sSmjp¯nt`¡v F¯n]Spw KmWNn ]psf¯n. N_k]pw fäpw KmWNn]pw e^v¯mkv tlO^Wpfm\v . fmSypknsâ b_¼v Njnªm\v Ak^psX Smfhw . C¶s`]pw C¶pw KmWNn fm{Stf DÅq , tlO^Wv bWn.
‘ t`lw Np_kp*v hms_ … h^v¡m^mlq{So tbm]n f^p¶v tfXn¨n¶s`…. Wmtaw NqXn At§^v Nm\¯nà “”blpknsâ ANnXn`v bp^«mWpÅ sW]v AknsX sk¨n«v Xm¸v Hm\v sI]vSp timhns` skÅw Ioän¨p blp¡sa Npan¸n¡mWv SpX§n . tlO^Wv CÃm¯Sv sNm*v NqXn sNmXp¡msS Wn^zmifnà .. blp¡sa Npan¸n¨v sSmjp¯pw kr¯n]m¡n , KmWNn fmSyp hm_nWpÅ {bmS`pw tIm_pw N_nNapw sk¨n«v bpÃp sI¯mWv tbmNpw , ASpw NjnªnknsX Wn¶m\v Du\pw , bns¶ D¨¡_k]pw Njnªp fq¶^t]msX b\nNav So^v¯p ko«nt`¡v fX§pw . Ak^v¡v f¡anà .
ssN`n]pw s»uhpfm\v KmWNn]psX tkgw . s»uhnsâ fpNans`m^p g^v«pw CXpw b\n So^p¶Sv ks^ .. DXp¯n^p¶ `p¦n sbm¡n N]än¡p¯n ]t¸mav Ak^psX NW¯ SpX fp¡m`pw skankm]n .
tlO^Wv Ds*¦n`pw b\nNav SpX§p t¼mav Ak^n§sW]m\v … F¶m`pw C¶`vbw NqXpS`v N]än¡p¯nt]m F¶v fmSyp Hm^v¡mSn^p¶nà ..
k^vg§am]n Hä¡v Njn]p¶SnWm`pw hfobNm`s¯§pw hz]w temPw sI]vSn«nÃm¯SnWm`pw A]mapsX Np® `p¦n¡Xn]n`v NqXm^w So^v¯p . fmSyp hm_nsW FÃmk^v¡pw Wà fSn¸m\v , dipfmWkpw . CtSks^ ]msSm^p tb^ptUmgkpw tNav¸n¡m¯SnWm`v fmSyp sb«¶v tWm«w fmän … F¶n^p¶m`pw B\p§av¡pÅ B hzemkw N¼nNp«³.sWäv